The Solo Mama Project is about the process of trying to get pregnant, being pregnant, giving birth, and raising a child as a single mom. My first objective is to provide a place for me to process, vent, reach out, express myself, and write write write. Next, it’s a place for friends and family to follow my journey. Finally, I’m linking over from Single Mothers by Choice, the national nonprofit that provides resources and discussion boards for women like me who are launching into parenthood on their own. I hope some SMCs follow me on over here once in a while, and post my blog on their blogs too.
Dare I dream that strangers will find this blog appealing? If they do,
awesome–and especially great if young women who are contemplating single motherhood find some solace or reassurance or at least a helpful example (or a good laugh). And, of course, there is the much more general audience who might be intrigued by this not-so-common path. Most of all, I hope you enjoy reading it!
After a long journey, Baby E was born in May 2014. Then Baby C in December 2017! I’m one lucky mom!!
For me, the only thing that matters is love: creating it, surrounding yourself with it, growing it. Love and best wishes and thanks for reading.
the solo mama project 
What a pleasure to read! Knowing the story in advance did not in any way spoil the experience of reading this blog introduction. You ARE a terrific writer – and you will have much to offer your readers – the ups and downs of aiming for a very precious goal. Count me in as a dedicated and proud follower of the “Solo Mama Project”! .
Thank you, Mama 🙂
I love your blog and that you are sharing your experiences with everyone. So many people probably feel very similar as they try solo or with a partner to have a child. Timing is always at play 😉 Make sure to go visit Ruby. Might help in getting an idea of when it might happen… She may even give some good advice that might be helpful. She was only a month off for me and at the time I wasn’t physically trying to have a child but was trying to get a commitment from my now very committed wonderful significant other so that we could both try or I could try a solo path. Be strong Solo soon to be Mama. I will also have lots of stuff to hand down. I’m already thinking of all the things I can give you once you hit the baby jackpot 🙂
Thank you, Malinda–timing is everything for sure. How can we get Ms Egg and Mr Sperm to rendez-vous? That is the question! I would love the hand-me-downs and will work on getting the wearer here so they won’t have to sit in storage for too long! 🙂 I really appreciate your support and thank you for the card too which I received today. Love the bunny ears on you. Keep in touch!
I’m so glad I haven’t hopped aboard too late to go on this journey with you. I can’t wait til the next post! I’m already addicted to the writing and the honesty. And the vivid, concrete details.
The most striking thing I am walking away with so far is the relationship between choice and parenting. As a fatigued, somewhat socially withdrawn, academic, married mother with more kids than I’d planned for (4), I’m in many ways different than solomama. I’m envious the women like her who feel affirmed that their motherhood is by choice, their children are deeply wanted, and hearing just how ready and committed they are. I wonder if I’d experience more love and joy in raising children if I had waited longer or more carefully planned, or had a different relationship to my own fertility?
Just sharing some thoughts from a different spot on the mothering spectrum to shed more light on what’s special about choice.
Welcome Wiggy, it means SO much to have you along for the ride! Interesting point about choice–the experience of being surprised by a pregnancy is so foreign to me now–for me, this is so very uber-planned, there is nothing the least bit spontaneous about it. There are certain benefits to feeling ready and kind of self-realized after spending my 20s and 30s with no one else to take care of, but on the other hand let’s not forget the downside–there’s no companion, no second income, no extra pair of hands, no daddy for my kid. It seems like the bigger choice for moms in all situations is the age-old question: is the glass half-full or half-empty–which do you choose to see? When I wake up in the morning, just before the ordinary stresses of life start to flood into my mind, I try to interrupt them with, “I’m grateful.” It does help. And I’m pretty sure that’s all there is. xo
Katie, Your writing warms my heart and to no ones surprise, waters my eyes. I well up with both pride and anticipation. Good luck with “all” that you do. Following “Solo Mama” with loving care. Your Dad, Cha-Cha
Thanks so much for your blog. I am an SMC with a 4 year old boy living in Northern California. I like your thoughts on how you self-identify: “Solo mama” sounds fantastic and, after reading, I have modifyied my “SMC” status to “solo mama.” Thanks for that and thanks for sharing your insights. I look forward to future posts.
Thank you- I’m so happy you found the blog and enjoy it! 🙂
Thanks for writing! Inspiration for me as I look for birth stories from other single women.
Love..love..love the doppleganger piece that just listened to on snap judgement. As close friends to 2 other amazing SF Solo mamas and 2 in NYC I really get to see the diff between the rearing as compared to my little nuclear fam. Keep on with all of the seeking and writing and living.
Wow, thank you! I promise I will. 🙂
Also very much enjoyed your story on NPR 🙂
Thank you! 🙂