pregnancy loss, running, single mom by choice, SMC, Uncategorized



Hi from Rio! It is SO incredibly beautiful here. We’re one block from the beach in Ipanema, I went for a run yesterday that took us the length of Copacabana, we’ve already had countless caipirinhas, fresh coconut water from coconuts on the beach, and every meal has been off the charts. Already looking into prices for a one-bedroom (anyone interested?!). When I ask, “Voce fala ingles?” they almost always say no, but they are so friendly and willing to play a game of charades with smiles and laughter. Today we walked around a hilltop neighborhood called Santa Teresa where there were bougainvillea-like blooms all over in red and pink, tricky cobblestones in flip flops, and views of the water that reminded me of San Francisco and the Mediterranean on a grander scale.

I just drank sparkling rose in a treehouse-like restaurant overlooking the city with my 3 travel companions. We’re turning out to be a great travel team. I’ve got the minimal language ability, P does charming sign language, K holds up Google translate on her iPhone, and A keeps us sightseeing where we might otherwise just laze around on the beach. As a toast, I said, “We worked hard to get here,” meaning the uphill cobblestones, but realizing that, indeed, we did work hard for the money, the time off, the prep, we are so fortunate to have this experience.

The baby project is so far back in my mind that I wonder if the whole story happened to someone else. The feelings emerged last night in my dreams: I gave away a crib that was meant for my baby and somehow hung from a high ledge wondering if I could keep myself from falling. Overall, it feels great to give this project a back seat while I enjoy myself and relax. My subconscious can carry it for a while.

I am showered for the wedding and have an hour to give myself smoky eyes, slip on the sequins, and buckle up the strappy sandals. It promises to be a memorable and well-photographed evening. I’m truly thrilled for my friends G and O, really sweet friends of mine, great for each other… I’m honored to be here to celebrate.

Rio-valuation of my life most likely to happen when we get to a sleepy beach town on Monday. Or maybe not even. I’ll just go with the flow here and check into my present moment as often as I remember. P just announced, “cocktail time!” from the other room, so… I’ve gotta go!


2 thoughts on “Rio”

  1. Hello from Maui from a fellow beach-goer! I’m so glad you’re having such a great time in Rio and that TTC is in the back of your mind. I think that’s what I was describing to you about me last week, and it’s been heavenly to not think about it all. the. time. Our minds need these breaks and it is rejuvenating for our spirits, so so glad that you have the time, money, etc, etc, to do this. Cheers!

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